Friday, August 31, 2007

Have Gun Will Travel

A 14 year old boy got suspended from school for drawing this picture in class, because it depicted a gun.

He was interrogated to determine if he was a mass murderer in the making. They only showed a small part of the interrogation on TV, but my insider got the whole thing on tape. Here is how it went:

Cop: Why did you draw the picture?

Kid: I was bored.

Cop: Does the guy on the left depict anyone in particular, like a teacher?

Kid: No.

Cop: Then who is he?

Kid: Just some random guy I guess.

Cop: Do you think its okay to shoot random people?

Kid: No.

Cop: Do you have any guns in your home?

Kid: No.

Cop: Do you often think about shooting people?

Kid: No, except when I’m playing some video games.

Cop: Do you enjoy those games?

Kid: Yeah, they are fun.

Cop: Describe why they are fun to you.

Kid: Well, you are fighting for your life, and that’s exciting. Other games you can kill anything you want and that’s power I guess. Fun.

Cop: Did you know shooter video games are just like practice for killing?

Kid: I thought it was just play, and different from real life.

Cop: Let me put it this way, if I gave you my gun right now, would you try to shoot everybody?

Kid: No, I’m not a bad guy, and I’m not stupid.

Cop: What’s a bad guy to you?

Kid: Someone who treats others bad.

Cop: Why do they treat others bad?

Kid: You tell me. You’re the one treating me bad right now. Why?

Cop: Because you drew a gun and may be a threat to society.

Kid: Anybody can draw a gun, so that makes everybody a threat. So that justifies treating everybody bad?

Cop: Yes, if need be.

Kid: So you are a bad guy, and society is a bad guy, and we are all bad, is that what you are saying?

Cop: Yup.

Kid: Then why pick on me?

Cop: Because you’re an easy target, and we get paid: I get paid, your probation officer will get paid, your criminal psychiatrist will get paid, the FBI who will put you on their permanent watch list will get paid…We have the power.

Kid: So ‘power’ is the key because it keeps society getting paid? And good or bad does not matter?

Cop: It’s all about who has the power brother.

Kid: So how do I get in on this power?

Cop: You just have to prostitute yourself to it. If you’re not a whore, then you’re just another potential John about to get screwed.

Kid: Okay, cool... Well all this is just a mistake. I did not draw a gun, it’s a boomerang. The guy on the left threw it to the guy on the right who caught it.

Cop: Haha! I think you will fit into society well kid. You are free to go...


BipolarPrincess said...

OMG! Is this real? And where the heck have you been?


Vince said...

Huh? BP, is that you? Wow, nice to hear from you. Thanks for waking me up, I've been totally neglecting blogland. I'll get back into it then, maybe baby steps, you know, slowly...

Yeah, the story about the kid getting suspended for the picture is true, but I made up this dialog. Don't know how the real story ended, but I hope the kid got his suspension reversed. Too silly getting in trouble for a drawing of a stick man. Okay, I'll stop by your blog now--It's been way too long since I've blogged man...