Finally Something Positive

So I saw a picture of tiger cubs playing with little chicks, without eating them...

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The chicks wandered into the tiger cub cage, and were not harmed. See, this is what I'm talking about!

This picture holds the meaning of life. It's right there all around us, all the time. Cherish it. Cherish the moments. Cherish the time we have.

(just thought I'd mix this blog up a little--you know, a little this, a little that...)

Season of Angels

Angel by Svenstorm on flickr

I could not find the infamous invisible flying plant in Australia. But I found a pub that served beer, bangers and mash, and kangaroo meat. And I found a Catholic Church with a huge stone Angel. All I could think of was how Divine she looked, and how ironic it would be if she fell on me and killed me—“Man killed by an Angel”

So that gave me an idea for a new mission—to search for a real Angel.

So I’m leaving for Singapore tomorrow to sin. I figure that ought to attract an Angel or two—you know, to try to save me from sin.

If I don't catch an Angel in two weeks, then I’m going to Paris to sin. If still no Angel, then I’m off to Rome and the Vatican (there’s gotta be Angels around there.) If still no Angel, I'll go chill in Ireland and settle for a Leprechaun. I won’t be back until April next year, so I’ll let everyone know what happens when I get back.

Have a nice New Year!

From Vince, to Lucy

A Model of "Lucy," the celebrated skeletal remains of a female hominid who lived 3.2 million years ago...

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Hominid, Cradle of Humankind by flowcomm on flickr

He approaches her from behind, he is close. She is napping, curled up in the fetal position, resting her wary muscles. But she senses him, and with one quick extension of her powerful arm, she shoves him back at least five feet and he retreats. She does not want him on top of her right now.

She opens her eyes. Her babies are snuggled under a bush in front of her. She is thirsty and the sound of the stream calls to her. The stream; it could be dangerous there, and as she walks towards it, her alertness sharpens. After-all, everything drinks from that stream. And a great deal of them could run much faster than she, and they are bigger, and they may want to eat her.

Oh, the water feels good. She looks back at her babies. Mam, the eldest of the females, is sitting next to them now. And there is Luk, watching her with one thing on his mind.

The past or future is not in her vocabulary. Neither is money, or time, or worry, or love. But she has the feeling of love with her family. And she has a similar feeling of love with the water that makes love to her body, the sky that tells her when to sleep, and the land with its endless wonders, and the berries she only knows as ‘Suk’--her favorite.

She leads a lonely life, but is too busy living to know it--a lonely life, because she is the only one inside her mind. Everything else is outside. She likes it when Mam scratches her back.

All that she wants is another baby. She walks up to Luk, turns her back, and makes her pose. All that she wants is another baby…

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Editor's note:
Hi Blogland visitors (if anyone’s still out there)--hope you are all doing well!!! I've been away from Blogland on various extra-curricular excursions. I'm taking a journey next week to Australia again for 40 days and 40 nights. Then I'm back here sometime in November.

As some of you know (April 13th post) my last expedition to Australia to catch the first invisible butterfly (Belenois Invisibilis) failed miserably.

This time, I’m going after something a little less elusive. A plant! I’m tentatively calling this plant the Arundiganth Amamilis. But it’s currently an undiscovered new species, and still just a rumor, but my sources and instinct tells me it’s out there in the Northern Territory—and I’m going to catch one. I say catch, because according to my contacts, this plant can apparently uproot itself and blow with the wind.

With shallow roots, it grows on other plants length-wise (flat, not tall.) It’s transparent, and virtually invisible. It can easily be mistaken for a slug trail, or when in flight, a string of spider web.

The problem is the plants are thought to thrive in a region controlled by up to 90 trillion Yellow Crazy ants. These bugs shoot acid in your eyes to blind you then they run away. Then they come back with a swarm of friends from their supercolonies to eat you. They can devour an entire human body in minutes.

I’m bringing my goggles, magnifying glass, Petri dish, rubber ant proof suit, and my usual Safari gear. Wish me luck!

A World Without Men:

Someone sent me a lizard in the mail. I’m going to take it with me tomorrow for a 4 day road trip to Reno for good luck. The lizard made me think of the Y chromosome. They say in about 125,000 years the Y chromosome will completely disappear, and along with it the human male. Females will become unisexual and capable to reproduce without the need for a man.

The Whiptail lizard already does this. They are all female. But since offspring are all basically clone copies of the mom, the species has to rely on mutation to adapt and evolve.

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So what if we woke up tomorrow and we lived in a world without men? What would be changed? Well, here are the top 10 changes:

10. The death penalty for being gay that currently exists in 9 countries won’t exist—since everyone will probably be lesbian.

9. God and the Bible will be obsolete—maybe there will be a Goddess though.

8. No more tampons or cramps—the whole system will change.

7. A two day work week—5 day weekend to better accommodate emotional needs.

6. Nuclear weapons will be gone—women are just not too good in math or war anyway.

5. Open sewers will be popular again—when’s the last time you saw a woman plumber?

4. Everyone will live in a shopping mall.

3. Women will be more beautiful, their breasts will look better, and they will make love with whoever they want, and whenever they want—just to spite the ghost of man.

2. Movies will be boring—I mean really.

And the number 1 change…
1. David Hasselhoff will be President of the United States—don’t ask!